THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW IF YOU MOVE TO (or Visit) THE SOUTH & MY WEIGHT LOSS

 Things You Need To Know If You Move To The South

1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.

3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one's seen before.

4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.

5. Onced and Twiced are words.

6. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!

7. Jawl-P? means: Did you all go to the bathroom?

8. People actually grow, eat, and like okra.

9. Fixinto is one word. It means I'm going to do something.

10. There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there's supper.

11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar. It is referred to as the Wine of the South.

12. Backwards and forwards means I know everything about you.

13. The word jeet is actually a question meaning, 'Did you eat?'

14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH em.

16. Y'all is singular. All Y'all is plural.

17. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or animal.

18. You carry jumper cables in your car for your OWN car.

19. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Cajun seasoning, Tabasco, and ketchup.

20. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports, motorsports, and gossip.

21. Everyone you meet is a Honey, Sugar, Miss (first name), or Mr (first name)

22. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.

23. You know what a hissy fit is..

24. Fried catfish is the other white meat.

25. We don't need no dang Driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive!!!

26. You understand these jokes and forward them to your Southern friends and those who just wish they were from the South.

AND one more:

27. Why did the chicken cross the road? To show that stupid possum that it CAN be done!

Weight Loss Update

I’ve now been on Zepbound for 19 weeks (as of 7/13) and have lost nearly 50 pounds (2.6 lbs/wk) – should have been more but didn’t lose anything during the two weeks that included our trip to Nebraska.  I believe I understand that these drugs don’t make you lose weight but make it easier to do what you need do to lose weight – eat less calories.  If I eat slow, it makes me feel full with not much food and I’m never hungry – can go all day without eating.  Unless we want the leftovers for another meal, Bev and I have begun sharing meals in restaurants and I often don’t eat all of my half.  I don’t miss eating anymore but I do miss my wine which I have cut out partially for weight loss but more so for a different medical issue.  I don’t have a specific weight loss goal in mind but I’m sure I’ll know it when I get there and I already like that my shirt size is now down by one X.  It's hard to find pics of the before me as I tried to avoid them but here are a couple to give you an idea.  

Here I am at this point and sad to say that after a nearly 50 lb. loss, when I exit the shower and look in the mirror (no pic of this to share), my belly is definitely smaller but I’m still huge so still a ways to go.  The negative to the weight loss is that without the fat pooching out the wrinkles, I'm looking older.

Photos can be slightly enlarged by clicking on them and the blue words are links.

Have a great day and thanks for stopping by Almost Heaven South.

Larry

7/13/25 event dates

Smothered Mediterranean Pork Chops, Karen’s Salad, And Posting Philosophy Addendum

Our kids, Rhett and Beth, gave us some special Iberico Pork from Spain’s Campo Grande for last years Christmas and we are just eating the first of it. From the web: “Known as the "Wagyu of pork," Ibérico pork is a premium meat from black Iberian pigs native to the Iberian Peninsula."  Renowned for its rich marbling, buttery texture, and nutty flavor, it is sourced from humanely raised animals with a traditional diet of grass and acorns.” For this meal, I selected a four-bone rack of pork chops which I cut into individual chops.  I looked around and found several recipes but smothered meat and pork is always a favorite of ours so I used the recipe for Smothered Mediterranean Pork Chops from the “A Labour Of Life” blog.  

Trip to Italy Day 25 – The Awesome Amalfi Coast - Out

Well, the big day has finally arrived – the major reason for coming to this area is to see the Amalfi Coast and we hired a private tour to do it so we could leave the driving to them and be able to take in the sites.  Our driver, Fabio, picked us up in Sorrento at 8:30am and the journey east began.

Socialism - Food For Thought

 I almost never do politics on this blog but I found this article to be too interesting not to post.

"Socialism

An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before, but had recently failed an entire class. That class had insisted that the president's socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer.

The professor then said, "OK, we will have an experiment in this class on the presidents's plan".. All grades will be averaged and everyone will receive the same grade so no one will fail and no one will receive an A.... (substituting grades for dollars - something closer to home and more readily understood by all).

After the first test, the grades were averaged and everyone got a B. The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy. As the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too so they studied little.

The second test average was a D! No one was happy.

When the 3rd test rolled around, the average was an F.

As the tests proceeded, the scores never increased as bickering, blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else.

To their great surprise, ALL FAILED and the professor told them that socialism would also ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great, but when government takes all the reward away, no one will try or want to succeed. Could not be any simpler than that. (Please pass this on) These are possibly the 5 best sentences you'll ever read and all applicable to this experiment:

1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity.

2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.

3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.

4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it!

5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation.”

Does any of this seem to apply to the USA?

We Are Now Hunkered Down

A little sunrise out of Cindy's BR window - pretty nice view to awake to.

Up to now, we have been going about life as almost normal but being very careful about where we went, keeping social distance, and keeping our hands sanitized, but now that we have confirmed cases of Covid-19 in our immediate area, we have gone into full hibernation here at Almost Heaven South as of Mar 24 with no more non-emergency trips out of here.

Air Fryer And English

I’ve posted before that I am not a fan of specialty kitchen gadgets and as I walked into the room recently there was a commercial on TV for an air fryer so I watched a couple of minutes.  Then, I went online to do a little research on them and discovered they work by having a fan circulate hot air around the food. 

I, then, realized I already have two of them on hand – a full-convection kitchen oven and a full-convection toaster oven, so no air fryer needed - $100+ saved.

Also, I continue to be concerned about the degradation of the English language and it’s no wonder we have communication issues as the meaning of words keeps changing (and this doesn't even count the new text shorthand).  In my younger days when mom said we were having fried potatoes, I knew they would be cooked in a pan (usually cast iron) with some type of fat (usually bacon) and I never had to ask if they were to be cooked in the oven or in the air fryer.  Per Webster – fried: to cook in a pan or on a griddle over heat especially with the use of fat.

So when you read about a dish coming from Almost Heaven South, you can usually assume the following:

Fried – in a pan with fat

Baked – in an oven

Nuked – in a microwave

Griddled – on the flat griddle

Grilled – over an open flame device (gas, charcoal, wood)

But wait, there are obviously some exceptions such as a grilled cheese sandwich which is cooked on the griddle or in a skillet and to make it more confusing, as a kid, we called them toasted cheese sandwiches even though they were cooked in a pan and not the toaster.  So if everyone will just start calling them fried cheese sandwiches I think all will be fine.  Hopefully this brought a little grin to your face.J

Have a great day and thanks for stopping by Almost Heaven South.

Larry

Memorial Day

While many have served, thankfully, our family has not lost anyone to a war, but many have and I am thankful for those sacrifices that have protected this great country in which we have the privilege of living.

The Store List – Which One Are You

For years I’ve known there was a major difference between how Bev and I go to the grocery store but I never completely understood it until today and it boils down to the role of the store list.

For me the store list is the plan and when I go in the store I forget everything else and move through the store picking up the items on the list and buy nothing else except the rare impulse buy from the stuff blocking the aisles.  So for me the list is pretty much the maximum buy list.

But for Bev, the consummate shopper, it's just the opposite and the list represents the minimum amount of items to buy and those that should not be forgotten.  So she goes from aisle to aisle buying those items she knows we need (even though they are not on the list) but being sure she gets those items that are on the list.

This explains how we can go to the store with the same list and I get ten items while she gets a cart full – can’t believe it took me 30 years to figure this out.  I'm not sure if it’s a left brain/right brain thing, being the person responsible for meals showing up on the table, or something else that accounts for the difference.

Which type shopper are you and what do you think makes us so different.

Ain’t it great to be re-tared and have nothing better to do than contemplate and write blog posts about something like this.  Life is good here at Almost Heaven South.

Have a great day and thanks for stopping by.

Larry

10/7/15 event date

Drive In The Correct Lane

One of my pet peeves is what I call left laners, or middle laners for that matter.  When I was learning to drive, you only moved from the right lane to pass someone and now, it is the lane with the least traffic, especially on roads with three or more lanes.  So I was very happy to see this signage form Rhode Island.

Click on the shot to enlarge.

Traffic moves better and it is safer if everyone would abide by this - there would be a whole lot less darting form lane to lane - think about it.

Thanks for stopping by Almost Heaven South and hope you've had a great Memorial Day weekend.

Larry

You May Want To Consider This

This may be the most enlightening thing I've ever thought about.

Thanks for stopping by Almost Heaven South.

Larry

Kitty, South Carolina, And A Rail Or Two

As you likely know, we have a cat, Kitty, whose job it is to keep the house free of mice and she is very good at it.  On this day, she sat on a chessboard without moving a man and peered out the window as though she was looking for her next victim.  She is wearing her pretty winter coat.

Thanks Vets

A Big Thank You To Veterans And Those Who Now Serve

The last sentence in our National Anthem includes the words “land of the free and the home of the brave!” 

But the American Hero’s Channel has been running an ad that says the “home of the free because of the brave.”  

These could be the most true words I have ever heard.

Have a great day and thanks for stopping by Almost Heaven South.

Larry

Saturday Humor - Three Contractors Bid On The White House Fence.

This would be hilarious if it wasn't so likely to be reality.

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House.

One is from Chicago, another is from Kentucky, and the third is from New Orleans.

All three go with a White House official to examine the fence.

The New Orleans contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil.

"Well," he says, "I figure the job will run about $9,000. That's $4,000 for materials, $4,000 for my crew and $1,000 profit for me."

The Kentucky contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do this job for $7,000.  That's $3,000 for materials, $3,000 for my crew and $1,000 profit for me."

The Chicago contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, "$27,000."

The official, incredulous, says, "You didn't even measure like the other guys. How did you come up with such a high figure?

"The Chicago contractor whispers back, "$10,000 for me, $10,000 for you, and we hire the guy from Kentucky to fix the fence."

"Done!" replies the government official.

And that, my friends, is how the Government works.

Have a great day and thanks for stopping by Almost Heaven South.

Larry

You Alone Are Accountable

In a society that seems to be filled with individuals who don't want to accept personal accountability, I thought this is something everyone should consider.

Thanks for stopping by.

Larry

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA

I like to run this every once in a while.

Just think how important it is for us that 238 years ago, a group of very brave people said we’re not willing to put up with this anymore and we are declaring our independence from Great Britain. They were willing to fight and die for their beliefs and their freedom.  While I often get frustrated with our government and our politics (and wonder if we should declare our independence from Washington), I merely have to look around Almost Heaven South or reflect a few minutes about the Middle East, North Korea, and many other places where people suffer under dictatorships or anarchy, or live in abject poverty, to make me very thankful to those brave souls of 1776.

So let's all enjoy our Independence Day and more importantly our independence and thanks for stopping by.

Larry

Small Businesses

Here's a little something to ponder on.

When you buy from a small mom-and-pop business, you are not helping a CEO buy a third vacation home.

You are helping a little girl get dance lessons, a little boy get his team jersey, a mom or dad put food on the table, a family pay a mortgage, or a student pay for college.

Our customers are our shareholders, and they are the ones we strive to make happy.

Thank you for supporting small businesses!

--Anonymous"

Have a great day and thanks for stopping by Almost Heaven South.

Larry

Philosophy - Four Important Lessons

1 - First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady:

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz.  I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"

Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50's, but how would I know her name?

I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

"Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people.  All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello."

I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Clara.

Mayonnaise Jar and the 2 Beers

I'm not sure where I got this but wish I'd adopted it about 50 years ago.

2014 Florida Trip – Country Music At The Campfire & Philosophy

Some of the best times I’ve had were the result of an impromptu event and this was no exception.  Our camping neighbor, Gabe, had mentioned that he had been a performing musician during his life and when some old friends of his unexpectedly showed up in the campground, they decided some music around a campfire was in order.

About 30 minutes later we were gathered round the fire, where some roasted weenies, others just sipped a beer, some bundled up under a blanket – it was a little cool - and we all enjoyed the sunset over Lake Okeechobee.

For at least three hours, Gabe played and sang classic country using his guitar signed by The Hag.

We had such a good time and only wish more campers had joined us.  While it's been cool here, the house sitter reports it's downright cold at home.

A Little Philosophy
As I have gone through life, three things I’ve learned – be honest with myself about who I am down deep, love myself for who I am, realize that others opinions of me are just that and only I know the real me, only then I will be comfortable enough to allow others to see the me that I see. 

Have a great day and thanks for stopping by Almost Heaven South.

Larry 

1/17/14  Event Date

Some Thoughtful Philosophies

A girl I grew up with, who is now a 67 year old cancer survivor, has been posting a lot of philosophies on Facebook and here are some I like.

Have a great day and thanks for stopping by Almost Heaven South.

Larry